Let's pretend this never happened : (a mostly true memoir) / Jenny Lawson.
Material type: TextPublication details: New York : G.P. Putnam's Sons, c2012.Description: 318 p. : ill. ; 24 cmISBN:- 9780399159015
- 0399159010
- Let us pretend this never happened
- 070.92 23
Item type | Current library | Collection | Shelving location | Call number | Status | Date due | Barcode | Item holds |
---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
Adult Book | Phillipsburg Free Public Library | Adult Non-Fiction | Adult Non-Fiction | 070.92 LAW | Available | 36748002058792 |
Enhanced descriptions from Syndetics:
For fans of Tina Fey and David Sedaris--Internet star Jenny Lawson, aka The Bloggess, makes her literary debut.
Jenny Lawson realized that the most mortifying moments of our lives--the ones we'd like to pretend never happened--are in fact the ones that define us. In the #1 N ew York Times bestseller, Let's Pretend This Never Happened , Lawson takes readers on a hilarious journey recalling her bizarre upbringing in rural Texas, her devastatingly awkward high school years, and her relationship with her long-suffering husband, Victor. Chapters include: "Stanley the Magical, Talking Squirrel"; "A Series of Angry Post-It Notes to My Husband"; "My Vagina Is Fine. Thanks for Asking"; "And Then I Snuck a Dead Cuban Alligator on an Airplane." Pictures with captions (no one would believe these things without proof) accompany the text.
In an illustrated memoir, the creator of the Bloggess blog shares humorous stories from her life, including her awkward upbringing in Texas and her relationship with her husband.
Table of contents provided by Syndetics
- Introduction (p. 1)
- I Was a Three-Year-Old Arsonist (p. 3)
- My Childhood: David Copperfield Meets Guns & Ammo Magazine (p. 9)
- Stanley, the Magical Talking Squirrel (p. 22)
- Don't Tell Your Parents (p. 30)
- Jenkins, You Motherfucker (p. 37)
- If You Need an Arm Condom, It Might Be Time to Reevaluate Some of Your Life Choices (p. 46)
- Draw Me a Fucking Dog (p. 58)
- And That's Why Neil Patrick Harris Would Be the Most Successful Mass Murderer Ever (p. 70)
- No One Ever Taught Me Couch Etiquette (p. 79)
- Just Your Average Engagement Story (p. 83)
- It Wasn't Stew (p. 88)
- Married on the Fourth of July (p. 95)
- There's No Place Like Home (p. 100)
- A Series of Helpful Post-it Notes I Left Around the House for My Husband This Week (p. 105)
- The Dark and Disturbing Secrets HR Doesn't Want You to Know (p. 111)
- If You See My Liver, You've Gone Too Far (p. 125)
- My Vagina Is Fine. Thanks for Asking (p. 134)
- Phone Conversation I Had with My Husband After I Got Lost for the Eighty Thousandth Time (p. 140)
- And Then I Got Stabbed in the Face by a Serial Killer (p. 146)
- Thanks for the Zombies, Jesus (p. 164)
- Making Friends with Girls (p. 169)
- I Am the Wizard of Oz of Housewives (In That I Am Both "Great and Terrible" and Because I Sometimes Hide Behind the Curtains) (p. 191)
- The Psychopath on the Other Side of the Bathroom Door (p. 201)
- An Open Letter to My Husband, Who Is Asleep in the Next Room (p. 209)
- Just to Clarify: We Don't Sleep with Goats (p. 212)
- Stabbed by Chicken (p. 221)
- It Wasn't Even My Crack (p. 238)
- Honestly, I Don't Even Know Where I Got That Machete: A Comic Tragedy in Three Farts Days (p. 247)
- I'm Going to Need an Old Priest and a Young Priest (p. 258)
- And That's Why You Should Learn to Pick Your Battles (p. 277)
- Hairless Rats: Free for Kids Only (p. 282)
- And Then I Snuck a Dead Cuban Alligator on an Airplane (p. 287)
- You Can't Go Home Again (Unless You Want to Get Mauled by Wild Dogs) (p. 297)
- Epilogue (p. 307)
- The End (Sort of) (p. 309)
- True Facts (p. 815)
- Acknowledgments (p. 317)